So I suppose I’m liked. I mean, we have this thing called the otto awards, where there’s categories like “most likely to go to the Olympics” or “most energetic” and it’s really cool because every year, from people pulling my name out of air, I get nominated. So freshman year I was nominated for “most likely to win an MTV award”. The girl who was also nominated is our weird little “miss popular” (I’ll probably have a post explaining the weird dichotomy of my school) and we’re friendly, we did theater together when we were little and were always up for the same part (she always got them). But the day of the otto awards freshman year, she told me congratulations. She thought I was going to win, but she did. Sophomore year I was nominated for most artistic, which just wasn’t going to happen, and I wouldn’t have deserved it. The cool thing about the otto awards is I always play and sing a song I’ve written. This year I’m up for “most likely to write a bestseller” and I kind of really sort of want to win it.
But anyway, this post is about me loving being a misfit. I went through my “I want to be popular” stage when I was seven. Actually. When I was in second grade I ran with the popular crowd. Instead of like drinking or staying out late, we would curse and watch PG-13 movies. I then moved out of the popular stage, and decided to try everything else. Some people never out grew it, and are still there.
See popularity, which is COMPLETELY different from being well liked, is a game. It's being the best at what everyone else wants. and I suck at that. I've been literally friends with everyone at one time or another, and I still don't have a clique. Mostly I hang out with the uber smart girls, the bands-you-never-heard-off followers (they're sweet, in middle school they used to be the materialistic simple plan heads, but they grew up a bit.) and the Jew Crew. Even the Jew Crew (which is so freaking weird it will probably get its own post), I don't actually belong to. My best friend Anya who I see literally everyday of my life (she goes to temple, camp and school with me) is my in, but I really don't fit in. I'm applying for scholarships while they're playing with light sabers on their iPhones. The Jew Crew is one of many sub popular cliques, and even has it's own dating rotation and weird bad ass ways that I just don't want to be a part of.
And I would never want to be "popular". Popularity is like this hot guy that everyone's obsessed with and wants just because they're supposed to, and I kind of feel like one of the few that can see his pimples and dick ways and isn't all that attracted to him. I'm not popular because I don't want to be. I don't care if they'd let me in. I'd rather hang out with everybody else, because those are actually the cool kids. Trying to be cool automatically makes you not.
No comments:
Post a Comment